Therapy Time! Crap That Annoys The Ever-Lovin’ Crap Out Of Me


First, let me preface this with some explanation.  Sundays I’m generally annoyed.  Why? my intrepid readers may ask.  (If you’re readers FROM Intrepid, how’s things on your side of the pond?)  Well, the reasons are threefold.  First, a rather simple fold-in-half, Saturday I generally work from 9:45 am to at the earliest 1 am.   So, I don’t like having to get my carcass out of bed to work AGAIN.  Second, one of those four-sided box things that you stick your fingers in to choose stuff, I don’t like being away from my family when they’re home.  Third, and by far the most intricate orgami rendition of every creature every to have existed on this planet ever, is the interesting collection of nematodes that I have to put up with on my headset in my camera tower every FREAKIN’ SUNDAY!!! 

So, as a way to work through the violent impulses that this causes, lest I run several miles across town in my socks again(besides, it’s warm now, not nearly as much fun) I’m posting this.  Now, to start with are the aforementioned nematodes at work.  To begin with, there’s the Master Blaster.  All this guy does is come up with crude and snarky comments, usually directed at the female type women folk on our crew, with all the regularity of an atomic clock.  Also, he complains about EVERYTHING, and yet his actions no matter the position he’s filling aside from doorstop are less than exemplary.  He’s been doing racing since horses were invented, it seems, and things were run so much better according to him at a racetrack that was forced to shut down.  Also, he has sources in the city that get him pirate DVD copies of movies.  As a screenwriter, this really grates. 

I could go on about some of the other annoying characters at work, but that’s for another people-I-won’t-be-nice-to-once-I’m-famous post.  Another thing that gets on my nerves is some of the stuff on my laptop.  Like the USB-1 ports on the back and the incessant “This device could work faster on a USB-2 port” WHICH MY FREAKIN’ LAPTOP DOESN’T HAVE AND MY PCMCIA USB-2 ADAPTER DOESN’T WORK ANYMORE!!  Have you ever tried to send any significant video work from the laptop to either a Flash drive or an external hard drive on a USB-1?  It’s like being stuck on a road with a flock of sheep crossing in front of you through molasses with a shepherd that has never thought of just following the course across the road blazed by the chicken. 

Subway commercials just make me want to hit my TV with something heavy.  Like one of my neighbors.  Whether it’s Jared or the annoying one with the girl who can’t make any choice in her life unless she’s at Subway or any of the others, I just start yelling in my head at the TV.  Of course, the fact that I can’t stand their food might have something to do with it.

E-bay occasionally is on the list.  Only when you find exactly what you’re looking for(video software) for a really good price(1/100th the original price) and either the time left is really long(on sale until the middle of the next epoch) or right after you put a bid on the bid-war starts and the stupid thing ends up, from starting at 10 bucks going up to hundreds of dollars.

Cable commercials will finish this off.  Especially ones that are for something really stupid–BECOME A LLAMA FARMER!!–or something that you just HAVE to have–YOU’LL NEVER FORGIVE YOURSELF IF YOU DON’T GET THIS AMAZING REPLICA OF LAURENCE WELK’S UNDERWEAR!!–or just one of those ones that the VO person either has no talent for reading aloud or some other voice abnormality.  I’ll admit it–lisps irritate me.  Especially when someone’s trying to sell me something I wouldn’t by unless by sending several payments of 39.95 I could either learn where the stuff from Roswell is(it AIN’T Area 51, people!) or maybe the address of who to send the movies to once they’re finished so they’ll be made and seen by people. 

And no, you’re not going to get paid therapy rates for reading this.

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~ by Sean on July 28, 2008.

6 Responses to “Therapy Time! Crap That Annoys The Ever-Lovin’ Crap Out Of Me”

  1. Sean: “…lest I run several miles across town in my socks again…”

    As long as you’re wearing something *besides* socks, I’ve no problem with this.

    Sean: “Cable commercials will finish this off.”

    Jeannie and I were watching CNN, and bust out laughing when a feather duster was advertised for “two easy payments of $9.99.” Anyone who needs to break up twenty bucks into two installments should hang onto their money.

  2. Ya know, I was going to make a joke about socking it to you, Bill, but good taste forced my hand…..

  3. Find a gym that trains MMA and make some time for yourself and Clone Boy. It’s good for you and it’s great for blowing off steam.

  4. Ya know, just thinking here, but to go back to Bill and Jeannie’s feather duster, it’d have to be made of archaeopteryx feathers for me to pay 20 bucks for it, on TV or no.

  5. But, Sean, this feather duster has a motor! And it SPINS! And it’s GREEN!!! Are you telling me that isn’t worth at LEAST 20 dollars?

    And if it’s a hardship you can pay in two installments of $9.99. Because they’d hate for someone to miss a payment on their 400-square-foot mobile home.

  6. It has a motor, it spins and it’s green…

    The things that can be done with that statement…

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